cannot freaking believe this

OMG! I'm so @#^%$& pissed off right now, although the reason may seem small or insignificant.

Since Jan. 2008, I've been in a community choir group, which I have come to dearly love. It's fun, it's relaxing, I'm not in charge or conducting. I just show up, practice, sing in concerts, and learn from the director who is a great choral expert. We've done heavy-duty classical stuff like Brahms' Requiem, but we've also done lighter fare like Broadway show tunes, patriotic medleys, and this season it will be the Best of Gershwin. For a sappy cheeseball like me, this music is fabulous and so much fun to sing. "I've Got a Crush on You", "Embraceable You", "Porgy and Bess", etc etc etc etc...............

Well, guess what? I can't sing in the Gershwin concert. Our school's Fine Arts Dept. is doing Grease this semester, and I wasn't told until today when the performances are. Yep, same night, same time as the community choir. And the locations are a 40 minute drive apart.

I'm racking my brain here. There's GOT to be a way to solve this problem and allow me to do the Gershwin, but so far I haven't found it. That group really fills a need for me, for something to be in that's just mine only. K isn't a part of it, he takes care of the kids so that I can go to rehearsals, etc. He is part of groups that perform, he gets to have the chance to use his skills in that way.....and also to have the social aspects of the group participation too. And this is that, for me. Except now it's not.

Again, seems like a minor thing, but I'm really depressed over it. The group will be just fine without me, so it's not that, it's just that I want to do it and feel like there's nothing else I have right now that just belongs to me and is purely for enjoyment. So on March 28, I'll be here at the #$&*@ school playing my trumpet on Hopelessly Devoted to You, instead of singing Gershwin.

*sigh*