Wow, I've been MIA around this blog for a while, haven't I? Sorry, blog-readers. I guess my excuse is just end-of-school busy stuff compounded by potential-new-job stress.
But now I'm back, ready to blog and listening to the amazing, historically significant and truly monumental news that Barack Obama has reached that magic number of delegates and will be the Democratic nominee for President. 40 years ago this Thursday was the date that Robert Kennedy was killed, and the country was horribly segregated and divided. No one in that summer of '68 would have ever believed we'd be here today, nominating a biracial man with a name like Barack Obama for President. But here we are, and I'll echo Michelle O. by saying that I'm truly proud of my country. The campaign ahead will be tough, no question, but I believe that he's up to it. And it's too important that we get a Democrat in the White House this time........so much depends on that, we've just got to make it happen.
(oops, did it sound like I was making a campaign speech, LOL? Sorry!)
The other item that makes today a monumental day, at least in my life and the life of my family, is that I interviewed for a new job this morning. I've only taught at 2 schools in my career--the first for 8 years, the second for 5. And now, maybe, the leap into another job, quite different from any of the other 2. It would be going from part time to full time, and that scares me. As I look back, I can admit that there was a time in 2005 when I honestly came close to having a nervous breakdown.....the stress, worries and fear that came from dealing with 2 former preemies, both with some degree of special needs, just piled on me so strongly that I almost couldn't handle it anymore.
Ever since then, I've been very protective of my time.........to do nothing if I want to, to be online, to play a computer game or take a bath at night, etc. I feel like my sanity depends on it. And there's a deep seated fear in me, of going back to "that place" where I felt so sad, so overwhelmed, so out of control and helpless. Becoming a full time teacher again does scare me, and I do worry that I'm taking on too much.....or is it giving up too much? But you know what? I don't even have the job yet, so I guess I'd better quit borrowing trouble.
Update at 11......or rather, this weekend when the principal swears she'll call to tell me the verdict, one way or the other. Not sure whether to say "wish me luck" or not, truthfully. So let's just pray, shall we? Pray that if this is the right job for me and for our family at this point in time, I'll get it and be successful in it. And if not, I won't, and I'll be ok with that. Sounds simple enough..........